Monday, October 20, 2014

One year

October 4th was a rough day for me. I spent the day with my little loves, doing mommy duties that are possible because of their existence. I spent the day appreciating the moments, because I'm in awe of the things these two are doing. But I also spent the day wondering how our lives would be different if a baby had arrived in April.  
It's been a year since we learned our family wouldn't be expanding in the way we had expected. In hindsight, after all my health problems this past year, everything happened in the order that allowed for closure and healing. But, that doesn't mean we're still not missing a piece of our family puzzle. 
I'm thankful that I've got two amazing kids who help me smile each day. And that they've got one heck of a guardian angel watching over them from above. I'm thankful that I was able to throw myself into Buddy Walk this fall to help keep me busy and happy. And most of all for amazing friends and family who are always right there when we need them.
Last year's Buddy Walk was a rough one for me. I was carrying around a baby who would never walk on our team. A year later, I understand that bringing that baby to Buddy Walk was important for me...because Buddy Walk is our community. I was surrounded by love and support, even though most people had no idea what was happening.
This year's Buddy Walk was filled with hope for our future. Filled with the knowledge that we've worked hard to help build a community for Porter and Penny to thrive. Filled with the knowledge that what we have is enough. And that where we are is an amazing place to be.

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