Wednesday, July 1, 2015

37 week ramblings

Thoughts at the 37 week mark...
My son uses the treadmill way more often than I do these days. We've added incline and are increasing speed a tiny bit each week. He makes me so proud. And, his sister is his biggest cheerleader. Sure, she gets to watch the iPad with him while he walks, which is a treat, but she also plays and dresses up, every once in awhile throwing out a "good job Porter" or "look at you go Bubs!" Makes this mamma smile. There are moments when I feel like all I do lately is reprimand, over correct and worry about how they'll want to run wild when the baby arrives...I question my own parenting abilities and wonder what I'm doing wrong- why don't they just listen? Luckily, those moments are followed by moments where they make up silly games together and laugh with each other and teach me that I should just give them space to
figure it out. 
Foam bath soap has been my saviing grace lately. With daddy at swim practice or meets each week night, bath time cam be tough. But again, I'm learning that if I make it fun and stress less, then everyone is happier. So we blow bubbles and draw pictures in foam soap while they wash their stinky feet. 
Life will change for them very soon.  I'm equally excited and terrified. This pregnancy has been different, harder. I'm big. I'm out of shape. I'm tired and my back hurts. But I'm still in awe of the fact that we're being given another amazing gift of a baby. A wish I didn't believe would necessarily come true. I'm thankful for every part of this experience, especially the hard parts, because they make the good parts better. I'm hoping that I can quickly figure out schedule and balance, be less neurotic about baby rules and really let Penny and Porter love the baby on their terms...I know I've got a lot to learn over the next few weeks. I'm going to try to remind myself to be thankful and to make the time of change as fun as possible...I'll need reminding. In the midst of the tired, I need to do more tickling and less yelling. More guiding and less directing. More paying attention and less "in a minute"ing. I need to remember to build up all three of these little lives. I'm excited to see what they become. 

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